Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Coping and Dreaming

I've had some really good news and opportunities lately. I was offered a full time position at the Children's Hospital so I won't have to move. It is honestly my dream job, I love the unit, I love my coworkers, I leave my job in the morning singing the "Good Morning" song from Singing in the Rain. The kids are doing amazing! Beckham's teacher told me he is one of the most kind and caring boys, and the happiest kid. Syd is loving horseback riding and continues to ace every test each week. My dog has gotten into training and she is becoming an absolute dream. My yard is green, my backyard is finally having seed come in. My house is almost completely repaired and again has become my sanctuary.

This doesn't mean I'm not still sad sometimes. Some moments it will hit me, all I've lost. The complete hopes I had. The relationships that were dear to me and are now gone forever. But it makes me realize what true love actually is, how you can't claim to love someone yet try to crush them. I would rather just be quiet than scream. Because I have loved so I don't want those people crushed. I've had some amazing support lately, from the most unlikely places. And it's helped heal a lot, helped me cope, and let me start to dream again. I will always miss those people and feel like huge pieces of my heart are gone, but I know I haven't done anything to try and add to their hurt. I have always tried to treat them the way I would like. And if they have moved on, then I can be happy if they've found their place. I wish there could still be that once in a lifetime friendship intact, that is the relationship that makes me mourn
Sydnee and I got the amazing opportunity to go to Wicked! It is my very favorite musical and Sydnee has been singing the songs for years. It was an amazing night and hopefully I will want to post all of the pictures at a later time. But for now, this is the shot I try to take every time I go to the Temple Buell Theater in Denver. I probably have a picture of myself in this pose at least 6 times.

Something good...It is take a fruit to your teacher day and Sydnee is taking a pineapple!

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